I look forward to this upcoming month, by March the gym is less crowded as the New Year's resolution crowd thins out. The ladies who take care of Baby at the gym agreed with me- most resolutionists let go of their goals by that time and those that are regular attendees keep to their schedule. So does that mean the people who are regular attendees never get sick, have car repairs, go on vacation, etc.? Everybody, including the regulars, have those wrenches thrown in their works. The difference between the regulars and those we say goodbye to in March is the ability to get back on the horse after they fall off. I think the 'goodbye in March' crowd has this ability to get back on the horse also, or they wouldn't last as long as they do, but they stop doing it in March. We talked about reassessing our lives just over a month ago, remember those New Year's resolutions?
Has the sun been out where you live? The last few days since my fever has departed the sun has shown unabashedly. Hardly a cloud in the sky.
This seems uncharacteristic for a winter sun so I've convinced myself that the tides have turned and spring is on it's way. Spring seems to be a universal sign of change, this is a time it is fine to say that something is going to change. You know, admitting something needs to be changed means admitting something was out of order in the first place. For instance, most of the year we are supposed to hang our heads in shame when saying that something needs to be cleaned. Yet this time of year we glory in telling the world that we're doing SPRING CLEANING- the whole house is so dirty it needs to be cleaned, top to bottom, front to back (did you know some people even wipe down their baseboards and such sick things?).
I would like to suggest that there is something in a human being so hopeful at this time of year that they are actually willing to admit to fault. In some circles this thing is called humility.
Humility is the difference between those who get back on their horses after they fall off and those who don't. Those who don't, walk away embarrassed that they ever tried to ride in the first place. Those who get back on value the ride so much they don't care if they fall again, they don't care what others think, pride or not, get back on- the value is in the ride, not what others think!
So I am reassessing, again. There is a wonderful article in my church newspaper I found after searching many places and finding good counsel, but this.. this is what fit perfectly, "Be at the top of your game on swing shift. People are hungry, people are teachable. You feed them; that's when you serve them most. Plan for swing shift, and then work the rest of your day around that."
Yes, I have read that counsel before. It sounded good. This time it struck me when my heart was ready. When it was humble (It took all that searching many places and lots of other things to get to this point). Now, I don't care what others think about how my day is structured. I take a nap every day to prepare for my swing shift. I go to the gym in the morning because it is important for my body, sometimes my Baby picks up viruses there, I feel bad about that but she has a great time and so do I. My family plays Guitar Hero and we have fun, we eat chocolate, I don't bake my own bread, my kids don't play sports but they read a ton. My family is awesome! (I bet yours is too!) This is my life, it is right for me, right now. I am sick, my life is not my ideal, I'm being forced to change what my ideal life is, this is a work in progress. I'm back on the horse, moving ahead with a better attitude than a few days ago. Maybe that fever was just a fall off the horse to get me to reassess. Whatever the reason I feel much better now.
I share not to brag but to encourage my readers to do the same humble re-assessment. It has lightened my heart and brightened my life although none of my circumstances have changed. Life is hard, a hardened heart will only make it more so.
yeah for spring! and for repentance and starting over! I do this a lot I keep thinking I will be better, but each time I need to start again. Its a good thing we have eternity to learn, because I need all of that time.
I'm glad you are feeling better.
Posted by: readerMom | February 17, 2009 at 06:24 PM
I just love you! I love that you're real, honest and still driven to move forward, given the circumstances you've been dealt. You amaze me and I love reading your posts! Thanks for the boost and for being you! BTW, was looking at some old year books the other night, you look just as young and as fantastic as you did then!
Posted by: Sweet Escape | February 18, 2009 at 01:23 AM
I so needed this!
Posted by: Harlene | February 18, 2009 at 05:37 PM