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April 24, 2010

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1.

I think that asking yourself that question is important while you are making a decision, but asking yourself that after you have committed to something, especially if you think it was inspired, is a sure way to cause yourself needless heartburn and worry. Well, maybe not asking it, but dwelling on it. Just thinking about our own decision to get have another baby and how easy it was to second guess, even after it was too late, and how difficult it made things mentally.

2.

I see what you're saying. But we really do have to thoroughly think through this. We can back out at any time. If a child is with us we can back out, but we have to give the agency a month to find a replacement home. This is different than being pregnant - that is definitely a no return situation. With this things can change in our lives, the child can change, many things can change that would warrant a change in placement. I have to be humble enough to admit when that is happening so we don't get into a bad situation. Doing foster care is as much about realizing my limits as realizing those of a hurt child.

Another part of this is being willing to do hard things. There is a line from a song that plays over in my head often "Sometimes the right thing and hard thing are the same." Not necessarily poetic language, but true. Going into something recognizing the difficulty of it is a type of preparation. If I know it's going to be hard, when it does get hard I will know that my decision wasn't wrong. The difficulty just goes with the territory.

3.

The tantrum thing kind of reminds me of the phrase "don't poke the bear." Makes sense. I'm glad you're sharing all your learning! I need all the help I can get. :)

4.

You're a braver woman than I am! But there's a need to fill, that's for sure, and I add my hopes to yours that the fostering will bring more positive than negative into your family and living situation.

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